April 20, 2009 - 1:49 p.m.
Not so beautiful actually pretty rainy and crappy out day. That is ok I slept late per usual, was up late last night, got some sewing in- was able to work on three of the pieces. Had caught up with A and had a really fun, amazing nite saturday night until I just got kind of ornery, it occurs when I feel extremely close to him my subconscious wants to retreat or revolt. Maybe it is my defense system against being close and i just get scared of actually having a relationship I have always wanted and this is the closest I have ever been. And trusting that it is really happening. Yoga would help it all - if I just chilled the f out that could really help.
Am going to the entrepreneurial class tonight. Looking forward to it I really want to start a gallery or collective hopefully the class can help me with some focus.
Started writing morning pages when I got up today, took out a copy of the artist's way and contemplating working through it again.
On Friday after talking to the business counselor I caught up with S at the Drama Book Store where we watched a reading of plays written by Stephen Adly Guirgis and read by some of the The LAByrinth theater such as Phillip Seymour Hoffman. It was good I felt privileged to be there and it was free, which was very cool. After S and I went to grab a bite then had our show- unfortunately we showed up late and some of the guys were not too happy with us just showing up after it had started - yea its kind of bad form but I secretly have always wanted to see what would happen to go on completely without suggestion and where it had started it isn't very supportive of the team but it was both S and I that jumped into - its like extreme improv! We got a couple laughs but I am pretty sure B & C are pissed I am sure they will get over it. OK I am going to attempt some productivity.
